"You may have heard about the legendary Go Daddy holiday party … the annual shindig held inside a major league baseball stadium … where employees are treated to big name entertainment, gourmet food and prizes totaling $1MM.

Go Daddy CEO and Founder Bob Parsons throws this year’s bash Saturday and vows this one will “blow away” any and all parties the company has ever had.

That’s saying a lot when you consider last year a Grammy-nominated singer and a Hall of Fame rock group performed … and an actual Ferris wheel was the centerpiece of a carnival-themed extravaganza.”

That’s from a hyperbolic press release by domain registrar Go Daddy (are there any other kind?) And it’s a perfect example of why Go Daddy is better off as a private company. Go Daddy flirted with an IPO a few years ago and pulled the plug on the deal. This year, it sold out to private equity firms KKR, Silver Lake and Technology Crossover Ventures.

Go Daddy, most famous for raunchy Super Bowl ads featuring “celebrities” like race car driver Danica Patrick and former Biggest Loser trainer Jilian Michaels, revels in wretched excess. Can you imagine the shareholder uproar if the company was public and wanted to do this? They’re having the party at Chase Field in Phoenix, home of the Arizona Diamondbacks.

And while it’s commendable that Parsons is willing to throw a huge party for its employees, why does he need to make it a media event? It can’t be private like most corporate bashes? 

The press release claims that “not everyone receives an invitation to the party of year" but I got one even though I haven’t covered Go Daddy since I retired from the media biz beat nearly four years ago. If I got one, my guess is that any lucky member of the fourth estate who’s ever mentioned Go Daddy in a story, blog post or tweet got one.

It’s amusing to see somebody out there still pretending that it’s 1998. But wake up and smell the sluggish economy, Go Daddy. Scantily clad spoksewomen may be sexy, but nothing’s hotter these days than fiscal restraint.  — Paul